iFML
by 1seddiefan
Summary: Carly, Sam, and Freddie had to have some moments in their lives where they were like, 'F my life'. This includes an OC of mine. Based on those posts on the web site Fmylife dot com.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't own fmylife . com. It's a real web site.

* * *

"_Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punched me. FML."_

Freddie was hanging out with Carly and Sam. Freddie was sitting in a bean bag chair, texting.

"Who are you texting?" Sam demanded and Freddie shrugged.

"Nobody." Freddie said and then replied to a text.

"Then why are you texting?" Sam said.

"Why aren't you nice?" Freddie asked, forgetting that it was Sam, and then the blonde tackled the boy off the bean bag chair. Freddie's phone skidding somewhere and Sam punched him in the stomach.

Sam got off of Freddie, after Carly shouted something like they had chicken and then she stood up. Sam ran to the door, but didn't see Spencer at the door. The door opened and Sam got hit with the glass door.

_She got trolled by Rick Roll._ Freddie thought to himself, choking back his laughter, not wanting to get any more beat up.

"Thanks for opening the door on me." Sam nearly shouted at Spencer using sarcasm, and then went down the stairs to the kitchen.

* * *

Freddie and his guy best friend Dylan was walking down the sidewalk. Dylan had blonde skater like hair. He had dyed red, blue, and purple streaks in his hair. He had light blue eyes but it had an orange ring around it. He usually wore punk like clothing, two dog tags, and some type of yellow belt, that Freddie learned was caution tape, and he was using it as a belt.

"So anyway Sam got done hitting me and walked to the door, but Spencer opened the door. She got a glass door to the face. That's karma for ya." Freddie explained. to Dylan.

"It was an coincidence." Dylan said brushing it off. It really did sound like a coincidence. How could it have been karma?

"How was it a coincidence?" Freddie demanded.

"I don't understand the concept of the universe getting back at people who'd done something bad." Dylan said and ran his hand through his hair.

"Ever heard of the saying karma is a bitch? Then it must be real." Freddie said.

"How can the universe get back at people who done something bad? Its like that saying, 'your actions have a consequence'." Dylan said and Freddie looked at Dylan. His eyes were intimidating more than ever because they seemed to say, 'what to challenge me some more' so Freddie turned around and left.

But somehow he tripped over his feet and feel down to the sound of Dylan laughing. "What did you do in a past life to deserve that one?" Freddie then stood up and turned around. He punched Dylan in the stomach. "Yeah. I deserved that one."

_Fuck my life._ Dylan thought after getting punched in the stomach.

* * *

A/N: If you got some suggestions, I'll try to work its way in this fanfic.


	2. Chapter 2

"_Today, during the early hours, I got hungry and went to grab something to eat. I entered the kitchen, only to see my stark–naked dad sitting at the table, eating cereal and reading the paper. He just nodded at me said 'Son'. I think I need a pair of eyes. FML."_

Dylan woke up around five. He was hungry and got out of bed. His parents were rarely home so most of the time he was alone at his house, except for the occasional inviting Freddie over to spend the night on a school night, because he's so lonely thing. So he got out of bed and walked into the kitchen.

The sight before him would probably scar him for life. His dad, the man who rarely comes home, is sitting at the table in the kitchen. Naked, reading a newspaper, and eating a bowl of cereal. All of a sudden Dylan's appetite was gone and his dad looked up at him. The man nodded.

"Son." Was all his dad said, before Dylan grabbed his skateboard and ran out of the house, still wearing his pajamas, but he didn't care. He wanted to get rid of the image of his dad naked out of his head.

* * *

Freddie was surprised to see his friend at his door, wearing plaid pajama pants, and a Guns N' Roses concert tee shirt. Dylan was holding his skateboard.

"What are you doing here at five in the morning?" Freddie asked.

"You know. Just wanted to skateboard around the neighbor hood." Dylan said and his best friend arched an eyebrow. "Trying to get rid of the image of my naked dad out of my head."

"Awe. Father son bonding time." Freddie teased and it resulted in a punch to the stomach.

"For punching me yesterday." Dylan said and Freddie nodded.

"Noted." Freddie said and Dylan smiled. Carly and Sam walked out of the apartment with Spencer. The three looked at the two boys.

"At least I'm not the only one wearing pajamas out in public today." Dylan said and then went in his friend's apartment, closing the door on his way out. "Do you still have my clothes?"

"Yeah." Freddie said. Carly has a spare sent of clothes for Sam who would unexpectedly show up at her apartment after an argument with her mom. The two boys went to Freddie's room and he opened a drawer taking out a fold of clothes. He gave Dylan, his clothes. "So. You saw your dad naked?"

"Yeah. It was a horrifying sight of my fourteen year old life that made me say fuck my life." Dylan said and smiled. "Leave so I can change." Freddie didn't need to be told twice so he left his room to give his friend some privacy.

_Fuck his life indeed._ Freddie thought.

* * *

A/N: I just had to put this one for Dylan to. You'll soon find out what I meant when I put that Dylan's parents are rarely home in a really later chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

"_Today, after my old downstairs neighbor, who would come upstairs to bang on my door and yell at me every time she heard a sound from me all times of the day, had finally moved out, it became clear that my new downstairs neighbor gets drunk and yells at the TV in the early hours of the morning. FML."_

Carly hated her old downstairs neighbor. After Sam and Freddie fought, her downstairs neighbor would come upstairs, bang on her apartment door, and yell at her for making to much noise. Unfortunately that happened all the time. The fighting and the pissed off downstairs neighbor.

Sometimes she would come upstairs and bang on the door, because Spencer was making to much noise while he was making his sculptors. Like the drill going off really loudly and her downstairs neighbor showed up banging on the door.

She started to yell at Carly because she was making to much noise. When Spencer was using a drill, the banging suddenly started happening. Like always Carly answered it to see her downstairs neighbor. She was a woman, who was in fifties, with graying hair, wrinkles, and wearing a floral night gown.

"How many times did I tell you to be quiet girly?" The lady shouted at Carly, while Spencer just stood there awkwardly. "You're lucky I'm moving away!" The lady shouted and then went back downstairs. The boy with the red, blue, and purple streaks in his hair stood there in the hallway, holding his skateboard.

He just also stood there awkwardly. Carly had seen the boy hang out with Freddie, but for some reason keeps forgetting to ask Freddie what his friend's name is. The boy's eyes were strange though. Carly noticed that they were light blue and had an orange ring around his eyes. The boy gave her a strange look and Carly closed her door, silently cheering that her downstairs neighbor was moving.

* * *

A few days later she found out that she got a new downstairs neighbor. A man this time. She later learned that he was an alcoholic, by the times he would stagger in the lobby and went upstairs. Carly was awoken by the sound of her neighbor yelling at something.

"Come on you call that a pass?" She heard her new downstairs neighbor scream from downstairs. Carly rolled over onto her side to see what time it is. 4:31.

_Who screams at the TV at four in the morning?_ Carly thought, trying to ignore the screaming man.

"Pass it!" The man yelled and Carly's eyes shot wide open again. "You call that a goal?" Carly rolled her eyes and closed her eyes, hoping it was a one time thing.

* * *

The next day it happened again. She was trying to sleep and then heard her downstairs neighbor yelling again. She looked at the clock. 4:34.

"Pass it!" She heard her neighbor yell again. "You fell down?" Carly covered her head with her pillow, hoping to block out the screaming.

_Fuck my life._ Carly thought and wasn't sure what time it was till she fell asleep.


	4. Chapter 4

"_Today it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by 'we' he meant him and my mom. They did however, make a point to say 'happy birthday' before they left. FML."_

Sam and her twin sister Melanie were six years old. It was their birthday the next day so they were excited. Melanie was excited to turn another year older, Sam didn't care though.

They were turning another year older, why make a big deal out of it. Their parents were still together, so it didn't matter as long as they were together for their birthday the next day. Melanie went to bed at her normal bed time, Sam however stayed up longer, and only went to bed when her dad told her to.

* * *

Sam was interrupted from her dream about chicken legs and bacon dancing and singing 'It's a Small World' when Melanie started jumping up and down on Sam's bed.

"Sam wake up! It's our birthday today!" Melanie shouted in joy but then fell on top of Sam when their bedroom door opened.

"Girls we're going to Disneyland." Their dad said and Melanie sat up in excitement after accidentally crushing her sister. Their mom Pam appeared by their dad's side.

"And by we, it's me and your dad." Pam said and their dad looked at them.

"Happy birthday girls and stay out of trouble. Especially you Sam." Their dad said and then closed the door to the bedroom. The two girls looked at each other in confusion, as they heard the car drive away from the house.

"At least they said happy birthday to us." Sam said shrugging.

"Yeah at least they did." Melanie mumbled and went to her bed. She fell on it. They knew most kids would be upset, but if you lived with parents like theirs you learn to suck it up and move on with your life. The two girls laid awake in their beds and stared at the chipping white paint on the ceiling.

_Our lives stink._ The two girls thought at the same time.

* * *

A/N: I felt like since they were seven, they shouldn't say a bad word in their heads. I don't know when Sam and Melanie's dad left. Sam said in iParty with Victorious that her dad said he will be back, but he never did. So Sam must have been old enough to remember that.


	5. Chapter 5

"_Today I almost got kidnapped. Again. FML."_

Freddie never told his mom that he almost got kidnapped, because she would freak out and lock him alone in his apartment. She probably would lock all the windows, and doors shut. She was that over protective. But he didn't tell. He didn't want to be locked alone in his apartment, with his mom thinking that someone was out to get him.

When he almost got kidnapped when he was ten years old, he accidentally punched the man in the face, kicked his knee, and ran off. He tried to hide his bruises that he received, after almost getting kidnapped.

Now he was fourteen years old and was walking home alone after school. Usually Dylan walked home with him, but he had to stay after school for something. Freddie was so deep in thought, he didn't hear the sound of a van opening, but he did fell some sort of cloth press over his mouth, feeling muscles tighten around his waist. Freddie tried to get out of the grasp off the man but his vision startled to go foggy, and felt the man release him.

Freddie fell down and was about to let fresh air in his lungs, but the cloth was back over his mouth again. The man fell off of him and through the hazy vision, Freddie noticed a red, blue, and purple blur. The only person that Freddie so far knew that had hair like that was Dylan. Freddie fresh air in his lungs and his vision slowly cleared up, Freddie heard the sound of tires squealing away. Freddie then felt a hand grab, but he was ready. He started to punch and kick.

"Calm down." Dylan said and Freddie stopped.

"I thought you stayed after school." Freddie said.

"I did, but it was only for a few minutes." Dylan said and helped Freddie go the apartment building.

* * *

Freddie handed a bag of ice to Dylan who somehow almost sprained his wrist.

"Thanks." Dylan said and put the ice on his wrist. "How can no one notice a teenager almost getting kidnapped?"

"I don't know. I almost got away last time." Freddie said and examined his bruises that he got.

"Last time?" Dylan asked confused, looking at the bruising on his knuckles. Freddie apparently realized that Dylan punched the dude that was trying to kidnap him.

"Won't your parents notice your knuckles?" Freddie asked and Dylan looked at Freddie annoyed. "Oh right. You're parents are never home."

"So last time you almost got kidnapped?" Dylan asked.

"Yeah. Don't tell my mom. She'll go crazy." Freddie said. _I almost got kidnapped. Again. Fuck my life._ Freddie thought.

* * *

A/N: I gave Freddie the kidnapping one, because it seemed to fit him for some reason.


	6. Chapter 6

"_Today, I made my brother go to the grocery store to get some frozen pizzas. Ten minutes after he left, the power cut out. Still no power. Still hungry. FML."_

There had been a few times the electricity went off in Carly's apartment, but she had Spencer and her friends with her. Though there had been a couple of times when Carly heard Sam beating up Freddie in the dark.

But the thing that kind of freaked her out was that the same boy that had the red, blue, and purple hair was there. Freddie had apparently decided that the boy should hang out with them. Carly and Sam looked at each other.

Carly had made Spencer go to the store to pick up some frozen pizzas so they can snack on. Spencer didn't seem to mind that a complete stranger was in the apartment, but since Freddie knew him, her brother didn't seem to mind. Carly and Sam looked at the two boys who were laughing.

"Hey!" Sam shouted and the two stopped laughing. "Weird Hair, who was your first kiss?" Freddie and his friend looked at each other confused.

"She's talking to you." Freddie said and the kid with the streaks pointed at himself confused.

"Yeah you." Sam said.

"I rather not talk about it." The kid said.

"At least tell us your name." Carly said.

"Dylan." Dylan answered.

"Who was your first kiss?" Carly asked.

"Like I said, I rather not talk about it." Dylan said.

"Why not?" Sam asked.

"It was embarrassing and awkward." Dylan said and shrugged. Carly and Sam was about to reply, but then the power shut off, throwing the entire apartment into complete darkness. Suddenly there was loud thump and the emergency lights came on. Dylan stood up and glared at Freddie.

"So sorry." Freddie whispered to his best friend because he accidentally kicked Dylan in the shin and caused his friend to fall down because Dylan grabbed his shoulder. Freddie was still a little shaken up after almost getting kidnapped.

The two girls watched as Dylan made a weird face at Freddie that kind of looked like a cross of amusement and a predatory look. Dylan proceeded to slightly growl at Freddie and winked at him. Freddie didn't seem to mind, they were comfortable with each other to act like that in public sometimes. Dylan walked to the couch and sat cross legged on the couch.

"So do these black outs normally occur or what?" Dylan asked, acting like he didn't act predatory to his best friend.

"Not really." Carly said, trying to get what she witnessed out of her head.

The lights were still off twenty minutes later and Carly was still hungry. Spencer however returned from the store to a dark apartment.

"What I miss?" Spencer asked earning annoyed glances from the teens.


	7. Chapter 7

"_Today, my parents told me that they've been having a contest to see who could punish me the most this week. So far, my mom is in the lead by kicking me out of the car near railroad tracks, and making me walk the four miles home in the freezing rain. FML."_

Dylan was quite surprised to see his parents home five months early, and looked at them.

"You guys are home early." Dylan managed to say, trying to get over his shock.

"Yeah. We're home early because we got a phone call saying that you've got two months detention for bashing in a vending machine with a baseball bat." Dylan's mom said.

"Now we're going to have a contest. To see who could punish you the most." Dylan's dad declared proudly.

_Oh god no!_ Dylan thought. His parents finally come home for a longer period of time, but just to punish him?

* * *

Day one:

Dylan was just taking a shower and the water turned off. He was momentarily confused, and his dad barged in scaring the fourteen year old. The next thing he knew, he was getting splashed with what smelt like beer. Don't ask how he knows what that smelt like.

"To get the water turned back on, you have to get me a bag of potato chips. I'll give you the money." Dylan's dad ordered and left the bathroom. Dylan wondered how long it'll take to get rid of the alcohol smell. Dylan then stepped out of the shower. He dried himself off with a towel to get rid of the wetness and put his clothes on. He then walked down the stairs and his dad handed him a five dollar bill. His dad was smirking and Dylan walked outside, knowing that it was a plot. A plot to try him and get him arrested for 'underage drinking'.

Let's say that he almost got arrested and now knows what it feels like to get breathalyzed tested in the middle of a parking lot with a bunch of people watching.

* * *

Day Two:

He was trying to sleep trying to get rid of the memories of being embarrassed.

"Dylan." He heard his mom whisper.

"Huh?" Dylan managed to ask and looked up to see his mom holding something.

"Want something to snack on?" His mom say and then turned the light on. She held a white bowl to him and he looked in the bowl to see curly fries. Dylan screamed.

"Curly fries!" Dylan screamed, somehow smacking the bowl out of his mom hands. "Why are they curly? It's so ungodly!" Dylan had an irrational fear of curly fries and his mom was punishing him with his fear.

* * *

Day Three:

Dylan had to take a trip to the hospital to see if his ribs were broken, but all twelve were bruised. Unfortunately Dylan now knows what it feels like to get hit with a baseball and a wooden baseball bat to smack into him.

* * *

Day Four:

Dylan was sitting in a car with his mom. He knew something was up by looking at the railroad tracks, four miles from their house. Dylan looked up at the clouds, seeing that they look like they're about to pour down rain. The next thing he knew the car was pulling over by the railroad tracks. He knew it had to do with his punishment.

"Now get out!" His mom ordered in a deep voice. Dylan quickly took off his seat belt and jumped out of the car. He never heard his mom use that voice before and that scared him. He closed the door and then watched as his mom pull away laughing. Dylan's jaw dropped and he stared as the car leave.

_Dad's in the lead so far._ Dylan thought bitterly to himself and felt a water drop on his head. He looked up at the sky and felt another water drop land in his eye, causing him to flinch. Dylan looked forward realizing why she did that. _Mom's now in the lead_. Dylan thought and then started to walk the four miles home in the now pouring, freezing cold, rain

* * *

Day Five:

Dylan managed to run in the school and closed the door behind him. He had to sit awkwardly in the car while his dad drove him to school naked. Dylan tugged his jacket sleeves closer to him, feeling all of a suddenly cold. Dylan sat down cross legged on a bench, and started to cough. His ribs suddenly hurting at each cough, and he grabbed them. Apparently his walk home in the freezing rain made him sick. Freddie walked in with Carly and Sam, then the three of them sat down with him.

"Are you okay?" Freddie asked concerned.

"Yeah. Sick." Dylan said.

"Why?" Carly asked.

"My parents decided I needed to be punished, so they're having a week of punishing. First my dad turned the water off, threw beer on me, sent me out to get chips, and apparently the cops was thinking I was underage drinking. My mom used my fear against me the next day. The third day, I got sent to the hospital because I got a rib full of baseball and a wooden baseball bat. Yesterday my mom kicked me out of the car and made me walk four miles home in the freezing rain, getting me sick. Today my dad decided to drive me to school naked. My dad was naked not me. I think he's going to pick me up from school naked." Dylan explained.

"Your life is more fucked up than my. I think I need to hug my mom." Sam said.

"Yeah. Did I mention they'll be home for two more days and then leave again for another five or eight months?" Dylan said and then left. Sam and Carly looked at Freddie. _Fuck my life. Is this week over __yet?_ Dylan thought.

* * *

A/N: Yeah, this chapter is longer than the others. I just had to make it longer, because I like tormenting Dylan.


	8. Chapter 8

"_Today, as I was running from the cops I jumped behind a bush to hide. Turns out it was a massive thorn bush. I later had the most painful shower I have ever experienced. FML."_

Sam, was arrested a couple of times, for shoving a chili dog down a cop's pants, beating up a cop, and among other things.

So she's running away from the cops. What difference does it make. She stole some bags of bacon and was now running away from the cops. She was running to Carly's apartment building, three cops chasing after her.

"Stop running!" The middle cop ordered, and people jumped out of the way, seeing a teenage girl running away, from three cops. Sam pushed some people out of the way, her hold on the packages of bacon tightening. She took the bacon the hard way, and she wasn't going to lose it any time soon. She ran to the apartment building, noticed some bushes, and jumped behind them. She watched as the cops ran past the bushes, and sneaked into the lobby with leaves stuck in her hair.

She ignored Lewbert's screams of 'no leafy children in my lobby', and went upstairs. She entered Carly's apartment and then threw the packages of bacon on the counter for Carly to make for her. Sam got a bottle of water out of the fridge and went to the counter to talk to Freddie. He was checking the comments on for their web show.. She looked at Freddie.

"Where's your weird haired friend?" Sam asked.

"At home. Still being punished by his parents. He's still sick." Freddie said.

"How was he punished?" Sam asked. She was curious. She almost found herself calling the police station, for child abandonment, for Dylan.

"He texted me saying that his dad was bringing him soup, and his dad 'tripped' spilling the soup all over him." Freddie explained, using air quotes around the word 'tripped'.

"Oh. Poor kid. Where's Carly?" Sam said and Freddie shrugged. Carly then walked down the stairs and looked at Sam. "Carly make me that bacon, while I take a shower." Sam went upstairs and Carly looked at Freddie who was deep in thought.

"You know, I just realized, that Dylan has an interesting smell." Freddie said, thoughtfully. "He smells like blood, sweat, and hope. I know it sounds disgusting, but it actually mixes well together."

"Please tell me, how you know that." Carly said.

"Well he spends the night as my house, we sometimes sit close together, and we hang around a lot." Freddie explained, then heard Sam's scream of pain. The two looked at the stairs.

"She hid behind the rose bush didn't she?" Carly asked, almost laughing.

"I think so." Freddie said, nodding in agreement.

"She deserves it from running away from the police and jumping behind the rose bush." Carly said.

"Yeah." Freddie said.

* * *

A/N: Sounds like something Sam would do.


	9. Chapter 9

"_Today, I was a victim of a drive-by. The attackers used water guns. FML."_

There was a couple of times that Freddie used water guns. One time he was in third grade when he used a water gun, it was on Water Day. Then there was fifth grade. He used a water gun on a couple of girls at the park. He almost ended up in a relationship with one girl, but then his mom announced that they were moving.

Dylan and Freddie were walking to Dylan's house.

"Who was your first kiss anyway?" Freddie couldn't help but ask.

"It was some girl. We were both in fourth grade and we both like the Spider Man movies. We were talking about the first movie and wondered if it's hard to kiss someone upside down. She decided to try it. So she climbed up onto a tree branch and hung upside down. I told her that she might fall down, but she reassured me that she wouldn't fall own. She fell in the middle of our kiss. It was awkward when she got sent to a hospital because she was knocked unconscious. It was embarrassing when she hand to tell her parents what really happened." Dylan explained.

"Wow." Freddie said and Dylan nodded.

"Yeah. Pretty much." Dylan said and then noticed how two cars stopped by them. The windows rolled down and then Dylan got squirted with water. Freddie also got squirted with water. "Hey." Some people walked behind them, also getting squirted. They looked at the cars and then walked on, like it happens every day. The two then preceded to run off, still getting squirted with water. Freddie looked at Dylan who was wet.

"Wow. We were victims of a drive-by." Freddie said.

"I hope that was water." Dylan said, smelling his arm, as if to see it is water. "Yeah. It's water."

"Okay, that's gross." Freddie said and Dylan shrugged.

"I'm growing up without parents, I like to see you turn out normal." Dylan shot back.

"Touche." Freddie said and they continued their walk to Dylan's house. "Where is wine from?"

"France, I think." Dylan said.

"Oh. I thought it was Italy." Freddie said.

"I think it came from Italy too." Dylan said. "Where did tequila come from?"

"Mexico." Freddie said. "What do the Swiss drink? You know those big mugs."

"I think alcohol." Dylan said.

"How about whiskey?" Freddie said.

"Ireland. Ireland Whiskey." Dylan said.

"Pirates drink rum, is it brown?" Freddie asked.

"I'm not sure." Dylan answered and realized they were at his house. "I'll look it up on the internet."

* * *

Freddie was sitting on the couch a little bored, and Dylan sat next to him on the couch.

"It says here that it's a distilled alcoholic beverage, made out of sugarcane and molasses." Dylan said.

"So it's brown because of the molasses." Freddie said and Dylan scrolled down the website.

"Oh look, there's dark, spiced, and light rum." Dylan said and showed Freddie the picture.

"Oh wow." Freddie said impressed.

"Yeah." Dylan said.

* * *

A/N: Me and my dad had the same conversation that the two boys' had. I don't really remember how the conversation went. Me and my dad were wondering where alcohol came from.


	10. Chapter 10

_Today, I fell down the stairs twice. I fell from the top, stopped in the middle, stood up, stepped down one more step and fell down the rest of the steps. FML._

There was a couple of time that Carly had fell down the stairs. But she always ended up okay in the end. Then there was Spencer, who fell down the stairs all the time. They were that clumsy. Then there was Sam who tripped and fell down the stairs, but was too lazy to get up, so she slept on the floor. Then there was Freddie, who Sam pushes Freddie down the stairs.

Then there's Carly. She was casually walking down the stairs, half asleep. She missed a step and fell down the stairs. She managed to catch herself, her body feeling like a team of river dancers, dancing on her body. She stood up, more awake, and then walked to the other stairs, stepped on the stair. She then someone manged to trip on her own two feet and then fell down the stairs.

She landed on the floor and then stood up. She then walked into the kitchen, like nothing ever happened. Carly then noticed Sam was watching the entire thing from her position on the couch, with a chicken leg halfway to her mouth. The two girls just ended up staring each other down, and then they burst out laughing.

"Geez Carls you don't know how to walk down the stairs today." Sam said and it caused them to laugh harder. At least they can laugh at the whole thing.

* * *

Then there was Dylan who sometimes falls down his stairs too. Sometimes he's so talented he falls up the stairs. So Freddie was spending the night at Dylan's house, and he was sitting on the couch. Dylan appeared from the top of the stairs, somehow he tripped and fell down the stairs.

Freddie watched wide eyed and holding back his laughter. Dylan managed to catch himself in the middle of the stairs, stood up, took another step, and fell the rest of the way down. Freddie couldn't help but burst out laughing.

"Are you okay?" Freddie managed to ask, between laughs.

"I'm fine." Dylan said, and seemed to think something over. "What am I doing down here anyway?" Dylan turned to the stairs, and halfway up the stairs, he hit the step, then fell back down the stairs. Freddie started to laugh again, and Dylan stood up. "I'm staying down here, because the stairs seem to hate me." Dylan sat on the couch and watched as his friend laugh.

"Sorry, it's just that it's hilarious to see someone get hurt." Freddie said and Dylan just ended up staring, a strange look in his blue orange eyes that made Freddie a little uneasy.

"You're right it is funny." Dylan said and started to laugh, then stopped. "It hurt. A lot." Then burst out laughing again.

"You're a weird boy." Freddie said.

"Thanks. I know." Dylan said.

* * *

A/N: Sorry, I kind of had writer's block, and was busy writing future fanfics. It's never to late to plan ahead. Sorry it's so short to.


	11. Chapter 11

_Today, my wanted to send a picture of me at graduation, she said I looked pretty in it. It was a picture of a different girl, definitely not me. Way to go, mom. FML._

Sam managed to graduate the eighth grade. It wasn't much of a graduation really, they were walking the track. The school only funded graduation gowns, not caps. She sat almost all the way in the back while Freddie and Carly sat near the front. Dylan sat somewhere in the middle with the 2.4 GPA kids. Freddie mentioned that Dylan had to get a ride with Mrs. Benson, since Dylan's parents were never home.

Sam almost felt bad that Dylan's parents were missing their son's graduation, and her mom had at least went to see her graduate. She then wondered if Dylan's parents never went to see their son graduate kindergarten either. With Dylan's luck, they probably didn't.

_Where do they go when they leave Dylan home alone?_ Sam thought. _I'll ask him about it, later._

* * *

After the graduation thing, they went to Carly's apartment. Dylan went straight to the food, he wore regular clothes under his graduation gown, hinting that he wasn't going to the party after the ceremony. Carly and Sam wore dresses. Freddie wore slacks and a button down shirt, with a tie. Freddie left the apartment to go change. Sam headed upstairs to change out the dress, leaving the other two alone.

"So. I take it your parents didn't go to the graduation." Carly said.

"They didn't even show up to my kindergarten graduation either." Dylan said. "I stopped expecting them to show up. I'm used to them going away." The two teens watched as Sam walked down the stairs and Carly headed upstairs to change.

"Where do your parents go when they leave you at home?" Sam asked and Dylan shrugged.

"I don't know. I keep meaning to ask them, when they get back, but I keep forgetting. I think they go on cruises or something." Dylan said. "Maybe Egypt."

* * *

There were times when Sam stayed home with her mom. She walked into the living room, when she heard her mom call for her. Her mom started to show her a picture of a blonde haired girl.

"You look pretty in this. How do you send this?" Her mom said and Sam just stared at the blonde haired girl that was clearly not Sam. Sam just stared. At least her mom thought that she was pretty.

_Way to go mom. You got a picture of the wrong girl._ Sam thought.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for the delay. I kept getting distracted. I'm still writing another fanfic. Sorry it's short.


	12. Chapter 12

_Today, I watched as my dad noticed a spider on the ceiling. Instead of getting a shoe, he pulled out a 9mm and shot it. I'm not sure if this is an epic win or a sign that my family is crazy. FML._

Freddie enjoyed the fact that his dad visits him and his mom. There was those times that Freddie wondered if he was born in a crazy family. There was his overprotective mom, his weird cousins, nieces, nephews, aunts, and uncles. Then there was his dad who was a leader in a motorcycle gang with his criminally and murderous inclined family too. Freddie doesn't really mind the fact that his dad is in a motorcycle gang, let alone the fact he's a leader in it, he finds it completely normal, with the way his family is.

So Freddie was surprised when he came home with Dylan to find his dad sitting on the couch, feet on the coffee table, watching TV. Dylan looked at Freddie's dad and looked at Freddie. Dylan just shrugged, then went into the kitchen. Why did Dylan find that perfectly normal? Freddie will never know.

Freddie dropped his backpack on the floor, walked over to the couch, and sat down next to his dad. The teen put his feet up on the coffee table. Dylan walked out of the kitchen, holding a bowl of Neapolitan ice cream, and sat on the couch next to Freddie. They were sitting in silence, expect for the jump rope song.

"_One, two, Freddy's coming for you,_

_Three, four, lock your door,_

_Five, six, grab your crucifix_

_Seven, eight, stay up late_

_Nine, ten, never sleep again"_

"I bet I'm the geek who gets sucked through his bed." Dylan said.

"Nah, you're probably the dude who gets hung from the window." Freddie said. "I'm the geek who gets sucked through his bed."

"Yeah. You're the geek." Dylan said, watching the part where Nancy found Rod hanging from the window.

"How old are you? Fourteen, thirteen?" Freddie heard his dad ask.

"Fourteen." Freddie answered.

"I brought you a present." Freddie's dad said and handed his son a 9mm. Freddie grabbed the gun and looked at it. "Someday I'm taking you to the shooting arena."

"Lucky. You get a present, and all I get is an eyeful of my dad sitting naked at the kitchen table eating cereal." Dylan replied and the two others looked at him confused.

"Mental images." Freddie complained.

"At least you didn't have to see it." Dylan muttered and went back to eating his ice cream.

"When are your parents getting home?" Freddie asked.

"Probably five or three months." Dylan said shrugging and looked up to see a black widow on the ceiling. Freddie looked at his dad who also noticed the black widow, and the man calmly pulled out another 9mm. The man loaded it, shot the black widow, leaving the sound of a gun fire echoed through the apartment. Dylan and Freddie just stared at Freddie's dad. Dylan smiled. "Your dad is awesome."

"I have to go. Tell Marissa I said hi." Freddie's dad said and proceeded to leave through the elevator. Carly and Sam ran in.

"Is everyone okay? I heard a gun go off." Carly said, out of breath.

"We're fine. Just some spider guts left on the ceiling." Dylan said and pointed up at the ceiling.

"Yeah." Freddie lied and slipped the gun behind a couch pillow. He doesn't need Carly and Sam to know his dad gave him a pistol. Carly and Sam looked at them, then left.

"I'm not sure if that was an epic win or your family is just plain crazy." Dylan said.

"They're epically crazy." Freddie said and grabbed the 9mm he got. He looked up at the ceiling looking for the bullet hole. "Where did the bullet go?" Dylan shrugged.

* * *

A/N: I just had to have Freddie's dad be a leader in a motorcycle gang. It just seemed to fit Freddie for some reason to me.


	13. Chapter 13

_Today, I got to see a waterfall up close. To bad it was in my bedroom. FML._

Sam had always wanted to see what a waterfall looked like. She'll never tell Freddie. Carly understood, but Freddie will never know. Then there's Dylan, who she will never tell. She barely knows him, she doesn't even know his last name for crying out loud. She was sitting on her bed and looked around her messy room. She then noticed the fairly large water stain on the ceiling from the countless rain, and snow, when the water started to leak through. The house was so old, that she was sure the ceiling would collapse, sometime soon.

She then noticed that the water stain on ceiling seemed to be cracking and then collapsed. A wall of water fell out and Sam just watched in amusement, for a few seconds then realized what was happening. Sam ran into the living room, almost tripping on her way down.

"Mom!" Sam shouted to her mom. "My ceiling collapsed!" Sam then started to tell her mom what happened and her mom rushed past her, into Sam's room.

* * *

Sam walked in Carly's apartment and looked at the girl.

"Sam, what are you doing here?" Carly asked.

"I saw a waterfall up close. In my bedroom." Sam said. "I know have to stay here, until the ceiling gets fixed." Sam looked around. "Where the nub and his friend?"

"I think Freddie said something about staying the night at Dylan's house." Carly said and shrugged.

"I wonder what they do when they spend the night at each others houses." Sam said, thoughtfully and her best friend shrugged.

"Did you ceiling really collapsed?" Carly asked confused.

"Yeah." Sam said and sat on the couch, putting her feet up on the coffee table. She turned the TV on, and started to watch Girly Cow.

"I think that's the new one." Carly said and sat next to her blonde friend.

"I think so to." Sam said and then seemed to think something over. "How do you think the nub and his friend meet?"

"I'm not sure. They seem close." Carly said. "I mean what other guys would mock flirt with each other? That's pretty weird."

"It is." Sam said. "I got to see a waterfall up close. In my bedroom." Sam thought it over. "How many people has the opportunity to say that?"

"I don't know. Boring people?" Carly suggested and Sam sighed.

"Yeah." Sam agreed.

"Boring people." The two girls said at the same time.

* * *

A/N: Not my greatest chapters yet. I'm rushing. That's why.


	14. Chapter 14

_Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued by in their original direction. FML._

There were sometimes Dylan tripped over nothing and fell down. He's that talented. He usually stood up and continued walking like it never happened. Mostly it was at his house, sometimes it was out in public. Sometimes it happened when Dylan was the store where he works at, he would fall down. His co workers would stare at him. How else would this kid survive?

Anyway, Dylan was walking down the sidewalk after school and then he tripped over a fairly large crack in the sidewalk. He fell down, noticing a car on the other side of the street, full of people. They did a U-turn and pulled up beside him. The people in the car started to laugh at him and Dylan stood up. The blonde boy rubbed his elbow.

_Owe._ Dylan thought and watched as the people in the car continued to laugh at him. Dylan just stood there and looked at the ground. He watched as the driver drove on, made another U-turn and then started to head back to wherever they needed to go.

The blonde started his walk to his house and unlocked the door. He walked in, closed the door, and dropped his backpack on the floor. He proceeded to fall down on his couch. With him only alone in his house, things are quiet. Way to quiet. The quiet seemed to be luring Dylan to sleep and the next thing he knew his cell phone went off.

_Turn it down you say_

_Well, all I got to say to you is time and time again I say,_

_'No, no, no, no, no, no, no'_

_Tell me not to play_

_Well, all I got to say to you when you tell me not to play_

Dylan was so startled that he rolled off the couch, and looked at his backpack, which is by the door. The teen decided to try to use the 'Force' to summon his backpack to him. He sighed when it didn't work.

"No use in trying to use that." Dylan said sarcastically and went to his backpack. He started to search for his phone and found it. He pressed the button to call back and listened to to the ringing, then it went to voice mail. "What did you die in three seconds?" Dylan hung up and ended up getting a side full of door.

"Sorry." Freddie said and his friend moved away from the door. Dylan rolled his eyes.

"Whatever." Dylan said.

"You're in a mood." Freddie noted and went in the house.

"Yeah. I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. Some people decided to make a U-turn, pull up beside me, and start laughing at me." Dylan said and started to laugh realizing that it did sound pretty funny. "It hurt so bad." The blonde wasn't sure why he was still laughing, but he was sure it freaked out his friend.

"Um... okay." Freddie said confused and stepped around his laughing friend, then he pictured what Dylan had told him, finding the picture hilarious.

* * *

A/N: This is the end of this chapter and fanfic. I started to get bored with this fan fic. I don't own I Wanna Rock by Twisted Sister.


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